Thursday, August 15, 2013

4th Day at School


Today (our fourth day at school) Russ was taking books and things out of a box and found the picture of Lynda that we had searched the house for before the visitation last week. I have no doubt that God placed it in this totally unrelated place for us to find because I have looked and looked and finally said "Lord, you're going to have to just put it some place I can see it". God is so awesome!

This is such a precious picture to me. The baby is Linda Jo Taylor. I'm guessing she was about 2 months old. The little girl holding her is her biological sister, Brenda Kay Taylor. She was about two years older than Lynda. The family lived in Brewton, Alabama and Lynda was born September 21, 1971. She weighed 9 lbs. 14 oz. which we know now often poses as many health problems as a premature baby might have. Lynda had about as many strikes against being born healthy as a child could have. The information I have about her birth I gained from the Department of Human Services and Lynda's medical records. Lynda's mother also Brenda Kay Taylor stated in reports to the social workers that Lynda's father Billy Jo Taylor hit her with a boot in the stomach while she was pregnant. The doctors also think that she might have contracted rubella while pregnant. During the birth, the cord was wrapped around her throat leading to anoxia. She was born hypoglycemic and when she was less than a day old was airlifted to the Sacred Heart Children's Hospital in Pensacola. She had a heart catherization done and began having seizures when she was just a few days old.

In this picture, I can tell that she was loved. Look at the little bow in her hair. Brenda and Linda both were dressed really cute and someone (I'm guessing their mom) took them somewhere to have a photograph made. Linda began to have more and more seizures. She had many developmental delays. Her mother told the social workers that when she tried to teach Linda to feed herself, he would get so angry that Linda couldn't do it that he would throw her food against the wall. Linda was on two medications for seizures and the doctors who delivered her and cared for her in Brewton wrote in her medical reports that the parents had been urged repeatedly to not take her off of the anticonvulsants but almost every December around Christmas time, Linda would enter the emergency room and be admitted to the hospital having seizures. When she was hospitalized, the nurses took turns staying with her because no family stayed. Linda was very, very hyperactive and had no fear. I know that she was a challenge for two young parents with two young children. Brenda had mild delays but nothing compared to her baby sister. I think a good bit of the time the family lived with Billy Jo's mother and father.

When Lynda was a little over three years old, her mother took her to the Mobile Police Department and dropped her off. She didn't tell anyone she was leaving her. She just dropped her off and she disappeared. Billy Jo was somehow contacted and picked her up and he and his mother (emphasis on the grandmother) tried raising the two girls. More seizures and a father that had no patience for a child with disabilities and Linda was voluntarily into foster care.

Now this is the amazing way that our God operates. At the same time that this precious little girl was placed into foster care, a 22 year old woman who had just moved to Brewton went to the welfare department before the boxes were unpacked and asked about adopting a child with special needs or a sibling group (thank you Lord for not giving me all of the children I would have taken). I was told that my husband and I were not eligible to adopt a child because we could have biological children of our own. I asked where these children that no one wanted would end up and was told The Partlow State School which I later learned was under court order for the death of several clients (and remained under court order for many years). I was dumbfounded that they would rather send a three year old to a state institution than let a couple adopt even if they were able to have children. I was told over and over that this was the law in Alabama. No exceptions. So she told me about foster care and I said "sure" and began the process of a home study. A few days after everything was approved, we got a call that I will never forget. The social worker said "We have a little girl that I doubt you would be interested in. She's deaf and has some kind of seizures. You're not interested are you?" I said, "Well, yes. When would it be?" I was told by the voice on the other end of the phone, "Tomorrow" and not much more. "Tomorrow" was our 4th wedding anniversary and we decided to go to Pensacola that night to get some clothes and toys for a child that all we knew about was that she was deaf and had seizures. We bought a giant Raggedy Ann doll for her to sleep with and some pjs in a couple of sizes because we were guessing. After 39 years, I can still remember what movie we watched...The Towering Inferno. We figured it might be a while before we went out to the movies again with a new child. We had NO idea how right we were.

I'll tell you more about her first hours of her first day in another post. As you can tell, when we adopted her three years later, we changed her name to Lynda Taylor Smith. This is really the purpose of my post. I have met Lynda's father and grandmother. Not too impressed with either one during the three years of foster care. I've looked for her mother for years to tell her how thankful I am that she took Lynda to the police station. I'd like to tell her how thankful I am that she didn't allow her husband to further abuse Lynda. I would love to put my arms around her and tell her how brave I think she was to try and take care of the two girls...one of which was severely developmentally delayed...not deaf but autistic. Some "type of seizures" turned out to be multiple types resulting in status epilepticus that always required emergency treatment. This young mother made the right choice. In my opinion she is a hero and I often wonder where she is and what became of her. I wish I could tell her how loved her little girl was and how much joy Lynda brought to our lives. I know she loved Lynda and because of this I have always loved Lynda's biological mother. I hope she has had a good life. I hope she has made Christ her savior so she can meet Lynda again one day.

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