Russ and I had gone to Cracker Barrel for soup last night and while we were waiting for our meal, I went out into the store area to look at the Christmas trees they were decorating. I was standing at the front of the store by a tree when a family entered pushing their son in a wheelchair. He appeared to be in his twenties and as soon as he was pushed through the door enough to see the trees and the lights, he began to clap. When the rest of the family arrived after parking the car, they were seated in the dining room adjacent to ours.
His clapping reminded me so much of Lynda. I wanted to ask our waitress if we could move to a table in the room where he and his family were eating. I knew I couldn't be responsible for my emotions so I stayed where I was. When we had finished eating and Russ was about to pay the bill, I told him I had to walk into the other room and see the young man once more. I peeped in and realized I could sit at our table where Russ had been sitting and glimpse the boy and his mother and daddy. He was being fed (as Lynda was) and drink from a sippee cup with a built in straw. After most bites, he clapped. I watched and found myself wanting to know his name. I wanted to know if he also patted his family on the back like Lynda did us. I sat for a few minutes until the tears began to roll down my cheeks. I didn't want to leave and I knew I couldn't form words to communicate with the family. I retained my composure enough to walk through the restaurant to the bathroom and hide in a stall as the tears could not longer being contained.
Not all people with autism clap but Lynda and this young man shared a love of expressing their pleasure through clapping. I felt like for a few minutes Lynda was with me. At the same time as I had watched this boy, I wanted to go to visit her and see her clap her hands in excitement when she heard my voice. The finality of the realization that this was not going to happen again on this side of heaven was again a punch to the gut.
I appreciate the fact that I was there when this special young man came to have dinner at Cracker Barrel. Lynda loved the lights on the Christmas trees like he did and she clapped just for general purposes that only she deemed enjoyable and worthy of a rousing round of clapping.
Now Lynda is clapping for Jesus and I'd like to think He is joining her in joyous clapping as Lynda worships our God and Father. I thank God for Lynda and I thank God for allowing me to be at Cracker Barrel at the same time as this young man. He blessed my heart and reminded me that Lynda is still clapping and is happy and loved in heaven.
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