Giving You Back....

Six months ago today.  Exactly half of a year.

I always knew you were a gift.  You were on loan and this world was not your home.

I was so afraid I'd lose you so many times as you were little and growing up.  I stood by your bed in the hospitals so many times thinking this might be goodbye.  Yet, it wasn't and like the fighter you always were, you would surprise us all and the day we would give you back was postponed.

I honestly never really listened too much to the doctors who predicted we would be lucky if you lived to be 13 years old.  When you had a stroke at age ten...that prediction did cross my mind.

After 39 years of being your mother, I guess I just never imagined that the status quo would be upset.  It was easy to see that your body was exhausted and all used up.  It was comforting to know that you were going to be with Jesus in paradise forever and ever with no pain, no disabilities, no limitations.

But giving you back was the hardest thing I've ever done.  Even knowing that death isn't final and that  one day soon we'll be together again doesn't fill this huge hole that is left in my heart.  For you I am of course happier than I've ever been because you are finally the perfect creation that God intended for you to enjoy for eternity.  For me, as your earthly mother...the day we meet again can't come soon enough.

Nana loves you and I am so thankful that you were and will always be my little girl.